Saturday, July 23, 2011

GROWING OLD

Getting OLD has been on my mind now for months but not until a mysterios illiness struck me down did I decide to take it seriously.

So many of my school chums have passed away in the last few years it has left far too few of us around. I never thought much about OLD age and guess I never realized how different our life gets as we age. We look different, we act different, we think different, and we become different.

I always figured I could accomplish whatever I wanted to. I remember saying "hey I'm just 32 and can do that (whatever it was??) next year." Then one day I looked around and wasn't 30 something anymore, I was 50 something. Even that didn't hit home because I felf good, full of life, oh, maybe a mild pain somewhere but nothing I paid attention to. Plus my mother, bless her heart was in her 80's and going strong. My only problem was I worked behind a desk many many hours everyday of the week for at least 20 some years. The only exercise I got was walking from my office in my bedroom, into the kitchen for a snack or the living room to watch TV before turning in for the night.

I won't say I didn't notice a change because I did but once again put it on the back burner in my brain. But then as the weeks, months, years went by gradually I noticed not being able to take a bath cause I couldn't get out of the tub. I figured I was getting older so just took showers. I had other very mild signs that something was happening but still I ignored them...my mistake!!!

Then finally a couple weeks ago I got up from a good nights sleep and walked into the living room to sit in my lounge chair and FELL! I still don't know how or why but I hit the floor like a stone. That wasn't the bad part even, the bad part was that I couldn't get up. I tried everything for hours (9 to be exact) but couldn't life myself off the floor. I can attest to what happened during that time to be the worst ever spent in my life. Finally I made it to the bedroom crawling, got onto the bed and fell asleep. Since the fall I can walk okay, thank God! But can't sit on a regular chair, too low, so I have to use my office chair which is nce and high and has arms to help me lift myself. I had to buy a higher toilet seat with arms to be able to get off once on. I can't go to a doctor because I don't know how I'd manage their office chairs plus even getting out of my own car. I am trapped in my own home for the time being. Luckily my ex has been here helping me in every way possible and has been a Godsend!

Anyway I've ordered a special sit down exercycle that I'm told will strenghten my thighs and hip muscles as it is made just for when they begin to atrophy, or lose strength from lack of use.

So anyway that's what has been going on with me and I blame myself, I knew something was going on and just ignored it because I never thought of myself as OLD and able to break down.

I would appreciate a prayer if you happen to think of me!